shitmydadsaysActive Twitter users may already be well aware of the account of 28 year old Justin Halpern, known as @shitmydadsays. Started after he was dumped by his girlfriend and moved back in with his parents at the age of 28, Justin began sharing with the world his 74 year old father’s foul mouthed nuggets of hilarious advice and wound up creating a comedy phenomenon. Now over 1.2 million people follow the twitter account and Justin has written this coming of age book built around the best of his dad’s quotes. Perfect for any graduating younger brothers, nephews, cousins, or friends you may know in need of life wisdom, there’s no way they can mess up after reading some the phrases found after the jump.

“Waking up when you got a baby, you feel like you drank a bottle of whiskey the night before, except the shit’s in someone else’s pants.”

“A parent’s only as good as their dumbest kid. If one wins a Nobel Prize but the other gets robbed by a hooker, you failed.”

“Son, people will always try and fuck you. Don’t waste your life planning for a fucking, just be alert when your pants are down.”

“I wouldn’t worry about money…No, it has a lot to do with happiness, I just meant YOU shouldn’t worry, cause you’d just piss it away.”

“The worst thing you can be is a liar….Okay fine, yes, the worst thing you can be is a Nazi, but THEN, number two is liar. Nazi 1, Liar 2″

Scheduled to hit store shelves in hardback form on May 4th, we have no doubt this will be one of the funniest books of 2010. Plus if you pre-order it from Amazon now, you’ll save 46% 33% off the list price.

Buy Now: $11