|FIFA Explained in 13 Minutes
||Last Sunday on his HBO show Last Week Tonight With John Oliver, Oliver explained the “comically grotesque organization” that is FIFA. This is the second week in a row Oliver has been included in TWIC, but we have our reasons. The World Cup started this week and this video is the funniest and quickest way to learn about the organization running it all.
||Jesse Eisenberg Plays Melo at the YMCA
||Eisenberg, of The Social Network and Zombieland, occasionally writes humor articles for The New Yorker. His most recent is entitled Carmelo Anthony and I Debrief Our Friends After a Pick Up Game at the Y.M.C.A. which is exactly what it sounds like and definitely worth a read.
|Nice Guys Finish Last Right?
||Science gave bullies a wedgie this week with a longitudinal study that provided evidence that the “cool” kids in middle school aren’t doing so hot in there 20s. The study author, Joseph Allen, stated that cool kids have a “45 percent greater rate of problems due to substance use and a 22 percent greater rate of criminal behavior compared with the average teen in the study” according to the Los Angeles Times article announcing the findings.
|You won’t believe what this woman does with ice cubes!
||The Onion, in a continual pursuit to shove as much of America’s face into its own absurdity, launched a new site called ClickHole in which BuzzFeed and Upworthy type headlines run wild. Here is an explanation of what exactly the site is, but look no further than 7 Pictures of Harrison Ford’s Ankle in his Prime. This site is probably going to confuse those who don’t know it’s a joke, as happens with The Onion, all the time.
|Arthritic Drug Mule
||The New York Times Magazine reported this week on The Sinaloa Cartel’s 90-Year-Old Drug Mule, nicknamed Tata or Grandfather. According to the Times, he was “the most prolific drug mule that regional law enforcement had ever tracked” when they pulled him over with 104 kilos of cocaine. I’ll be lucky to find the keys when I’m that age.
|All of our patent are belong to you.
||Tesla, manufacturer of the first fully electric sports car, made waves earlier this week in the intellectual property world by declaring it “will not initiate patent lawsuits against anyone who, in good faith, wants to use our technology”. This open source philosophy follows their company motto of putting the environment and social advancement first, profits second.
|How to be creepy, anonymously.
||New York Magazine put together a complete guide of anonymous apps, in order to help people get their freak on, unrestricted.
|No Blow for the World Cup
||Vice reported this week that there’s a major cocaine shortage in England right now, just as demand is skyrocketing due to World Cup related parties. According to Vice, “a string of international and domestic drug busts has led to a shortage just as the tournament gets underway. Though the North and the Midlands are the hardest-hit regions, prices are soaring and purity levels are plummeting all over the country.”
|Bill F#@cking Murray!
||The New Yorker breaks down Bill Murray, one of the most famous men of our generation and a continual party crasher.
|Reddit rounds up This Week in Technology
||Redditors on the subreddit r/futurology rounded up their weekly “This Week in Technology Report“. Highlights include emotion sensing robots and solar panels that work in the shade.
|Final: Rangers 2 | King 1
||Last Wednesday, the Rangers managed to prolong the series (which is now at 3-1, favoring the Kings) by holding onto an early lead against the Kings. They need three more wins to take home the Stanley Cup Championship while the Kings are only one week away. Their next matchup is tonight at 8 p.m. (EST) in Los Angeles.