Tired? Upgrade The Way You Sleep.

Most people I know tend to fall into one of two categories with regards to sleep: deprived folks who revere sleep as a lusted after indulgence or the highly motivated individuals for whom sleep is a necessary evil interrupting their plans. Regardless of where you lie on that spectrum, years of combined anecdotal Gear Patrol research have proven one theory true for all mankind. Without good sleep, man cannot function well. Luckily, the ingenious boys and girls over at pzizz have engineered a very sound (double-entendre) solution to your sorry slumber situation.

Pzizz is a software application designed to help the average Joe fall asleep faster, sleep better, and awake in a positive, refreshed state. The software is downloadable, available for both Mac and Windows, and features a module for power naps (the energizer module) and night time (the sleep module). Push play on pzizz and you’ll get a sleepy-time sound track mixed fresh (as in different every time) featuring voice, music, and sounds all harmoniously striving to knock you out without the aid of habit-forming drugs or a sharp blow to the head. You can pore over all the specifics on their website, but here’s the condensed version: it’s mind control. More after the jump.

While there, you can check out a demo before you buy, and the energizer and sleep modules are available separately or as a bundle. The customized tracks can even be exported to iTunes and used on any MP3 player, in case you don’t want to wake up with keyboard marks on your face (as I did once). For an even better solution, the pzizz store offers its own special hand-held unit referred to as “the ultimate napping machine.” Awesome.

After a few weeks of testing both the day and night mixes, I can honestly say this is an effective relaxant for something that doesn’t come in liquid form. For me, there is usually a fair amount of time between the moment that my head hits the pillow (or my desk) and when my mind actually calms down enough to sleep. Without question, pzizz knows how to make that transaction much more efficient.

That said, I think that the best review came from the person who sleeps by my side. After awakening from a pzizz-induced snooze, she (a professional nap-taker by trade) groggily said, “I feel like I just had a brain massage.” Sign me up.

Cost: $30-$50 @ Pzizz