So much for the Swiss being neutral

Stayglow Victorinox Swiss Army Knife

We’re not exactly sure how this happened, but alas, Victorinox Swiss Army released a glow-in-the-dark version of their most beloved Swiss Army Knife. While the color choice is one that would make grandpa roll over in his grave, it’s certain to be a hit among subcultures from coast to coast. For those of the hipster ilk, be sure to carry this folding apparatus right next to your guy-liner when attending a local Skrillex concert. But beware: hidden within the glowing object that you’re haphazardly twirling like a glow-stick is a sharp object that has been used by far greater men throughout history. If you can stand the name-calling and preconceived notions, this knife will still get the job done. We’re not saying we’d buy it, but we’re not saying we wouldn’t.

Buy Now: $25